not to be mean or rude or anything but this wasn't that good of a story. you should have ended it when she found out that her friend was actually dead. i don't know, maybe i'm just to mature for this story or something. I can tell your an ammature by the way you wrote it. work on your material a bit and next time make sure that the story is actually SCARY. i want to feel chills, not think about hot chocoalte and rainbows....
Aug 03, 2009 Rating
reply to comment by haha by: Anonymous
wat the heck, haha!? the begining was great it totally grabbed my attention. if you think this story was bad, there is something SERIOUSLY wrong with you
Jul 17, 2009 Rating
wow! :) by: Nicole
That was so great! I enjoyed every single bit of it!!! Im totaly speechless!!!!!! U should TOTALLY be an auther when u grow up!!!!!!!! And i dont say this 2 everyone. Im not kidding about this... :)
I loved the plot and the problem. I really did think that Allinah was going to go away 4ever. U really make EVERYTHING about the story GREAT!!!! KEEP WRITING A LOT lol!!
Jul 05, 2009 Rating
cool by: Marie
that was unique! it was good!
Jun 13, 2009 Rating
reply to comment by Hater by: Anna
Hater, you couldn't be more disturbed. She did a fantastic job on her story.
Jun 13, 2009 Rating
wow!!!!!!!!!!!! by: Anna
wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow!!!!!!!! amazing!!!! alot of people on this site say that some of the story writers should become authors.....in this case, its really true!! This was an amazing story!!!!! I enjoyed every single second of it!!! you are an INCREDIBLE writer!!!!!! awsome, amazing, incredible, fabulous job!!!!! :D
SIX STARS!!!!
Jun 13, 2009 Rating
Great! by: Anonymous
This story was amazing! I really hate those little teeny short stories, so I was really happy to read a long one! Thanks!Five stars!
Nov 11, 2008 Rating
Good by: neluus
among all the stories i read in this site so far this is the story which i really liked coz it kept the readers attention and i must say if you are under 16 you will be a great write later keep up the gud work and all the best
Dec 13, 2007 Rating
haha by: haha
Too much description at beginning couldn't be bothered to read the rest!!
Dec 12, 2007 Rating
yuck by: Hater
I hate it because it was sooooooooooo long and it took me too long to read it!
Dec 01, 2007 Rating
Love it by: your bff (millls)
I am so proud of you! you're going to be a famous writer when your're older! I can't wait girl! Love ya and keep writing!
Nov 30, 2007 Rating
Spectacular story by: Ethan B (SC)
Great Job!!! The story was awesome. I was so scared!I didn't know if Allinah was going to disappear because they wouldn't find the spell or she would die again after they found the spell.
Nov 29, 2007 Rating
Thanks for the contribution by: PhilG
I am very happy to get stories like this one for my site. All too often the stories are too short or very poorly constructed. Yours truly kept my attention and was well written.
I do hope this is your original work and that you are under 16 years of age.
Please encourage your friends to submit their well thought out stories and comments so we can keep the level of quality up to the standard you have shown here.
