Drastic measures

by Sarah J.
(Washington, D.C. USA)

Watching TV

One of the recommendations found on this site has helped us a great deal with our daughter, but I am wondering if anyone else shares a concern I have regarding the drastic measures sometimes needed.

My question really has to do with taking the actions necessary to affect behavior modification. The result may be positive, and I have an example of that later, but could there be other effects by shifting routines, style etc.? I guess I am leery of having something come back to bite me.

My example is that our daughter, Tina, did have a TV in her room and, worse, it was facing away from the door and she also had a DVD player. So even if we were casually checking to see what she was watching we would have to invade her space regularly and our intentions would be quite obvious.

OK, I know, we're the parents so we shouldn't be so skittish. Well we took the step to remove the TV and DVD player altogether. We experienced the expected argument initially, with all the 'my room' and 'privacy' and 'no respect' arguments, but there was soon a surprising change.

Tina would be less eager to hangout in her room and started visiting me in the kitchen before dinner and sitting with us in the evenings. We even went to a couple of movies together. Just the little extra talking has made a world of difference.

So the change was good, but will our putting our foot down, and taking something from her, make her resent us down the road? Or will she want the stuff back when she's older and then be even angrier? Any thoughts?